One bit of research done by Harris Poll found that people who changed said it wasn't status, it wasn't money, it wasn't power that made them want to change — it was self-respect, affection, and acceptance. Those three were more important than the ones listed before.
You do know where you get those, don't you? You get your self-respect from being respectable, you get your affection by being affectionate, and you get acceptance by giving acceptance.
The principles taught in the Bible by the Good Lord way back yonder still work today ... if we really want to change and be changed!
[Jesus said] "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven." (Matthew 18:3 NRS)