A Year with Jesus: 'Love before Nightfall'

Dear Beloved,

Satan tries to mess up every act of genuine love. What you read in the verses below is one of My most precious moments with My closest disciples. They still did not understand what was about to happen to Me. They were clueless about what the next few days would mean to them some day and what price I would soon pay. They were teetering on the brink of striving for religious position and privilege just like the folks who were trying to kill Me - the very same folks whom I rebuked in yesterday's verses.

I had often spoken to My disciples about the greatest in My kingdom being servants (Mark 10:43). Rather than give a theological discourse on the nature of being a servant, I knew they needed a demonstration of serving that showed them My love as I faced My own death. I think you will find this time with My disciples to be quite precious. My actions, centered in sacrificial love, showed that in My kingdom, the greatest is a servant. Greatness is not found in the person of position and power at the head of the table and receiving all the attention while being waited upon hand and foot. Greatness is found in the one who is willing to do things like wash feet and who cares genuinely for others while facing difficult challenges himself or herself.

Of course, Peter, as he so often did, got things a little confused. The others were mystified by what I was doing. Why would I, their Lord and Teacher, stoop down, pick up the towel, and wash their feet? Washing feet was the job of a house slave.

These disciples I loved so dearly needed to know that serving is the nature of genuine leadership. As the minutes I was going to have with them were speeding quickly into the past, I wanted to leave them a memory that would stick in their hearts and transform their attitudes.

Judas, in the moment of My demonstration of love, was biding time until he could turn Me over to those who wanted to kill Me. He was close to Me. He shared this meal with Me. We shared the same cup. We shared the same bread. He had spent three years with Me. No one else suspected what was in his heart - his heart that he had given to Satan to control fully.

On your worst days, you may be shown disloyalty even in the face of your love, just as I was. You give all that you have to someone, then he or she lets you down like all those at the table with Me in the verses below let me down. Some overstate their commitment to you and then can't live up to their promises. Some sell you out for what they think is a better offer. Others simply abandon you in your hour of need.

No matter what people might do to you - even people whom you have loved with all that you have and all that you are, you know you can always come to Me and talk to Me about how you feel. I know the hurt. I know the gut-wrenching ache of abandonment. I know the disappointment of hours of love invested in someone who doesn't fully appreciate your love for him or her. I know the loneliness of facing the ridicule of others while having no friend there for you. I know because this is what I experienced.

When Judas left our table, John's words hauntingly state the truth with brutal finality: "So Judas took his piece of bread and departed into the night." I hope you never know the feeling of such heartbreaking nightfall. If you do, remember this: I know what it feels like, and I will help you through it if you will call out to Me!