Your attitude should be the same that Christ Jesus had. Though he was God, he did not demand and cling to his rights as God. He made himself nothing; he took the humble position of a slave and appeared in human form. And in human form he obediently humbled himself even further by dying a criminal's death on a cross. Because of this, God raised him up to the heights of heaven and gave him a name that is above every other name, so that at the name of Jesus every knee will bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father. (Philippians 2:5-11 NLT)
A husband and a wife were sitting before a marriage counselor, seeking his help. While the husband seemed oblivious to any problems, the wife complained about how inattentive he is to her. The counselor decided to test the husband and asked him, "What is your wife's favorite flower?"
The husband proudly and unhesitantly replied, "I know this one. I buy it for her all the time." He then leaned over, affectionately patted his wife's arm and said, "It's Pillsbury, isn't it honey?"
While we may chuckle at the above fictional story, real-life marriage problems are anything but funny. Yet, more and more people find themselves in failing marriages. Statistics tell us that one out of every two marriages entered into is broken in the courtroom. I am forced to wonder of those that aren't officially broken in the courtroom, how many are broken in the heart?
While I understand that marriage problems are often complex, and wounds inflicted by hurtful words and actions take time to heal, the key to a successful marriage is selflessness.
If we could stop concentrating on having our own needs met and focus instead on ways to meet the needs of our spouse, many of our struggling marriages would flourish. We must learn to ...
- give rather than receive
- serve rather than be served
- minister rather than demand to receive ministry
- look out for the interests of the other rather just looking out for our own interests
It almost sounds like something our Lord would say and do, doesn't it?
"Whoever wants to be a leader among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be the slave of all. For even I, the Son of Man, came here not to be served but to serve others, and to give my life as a ransom for many." (Mark 10:44-45)