Ideas for High Impact Parenting by Ron Rose

    The following suggestions were collected during my research for the book 7 Things Kids Never Forget. Parents who practice these things will become influential, High Impact Parents, HIP for short.

• Fill your times with positive experiences.

• Do unusual or outlandish things just for the kids.

• Discuss difficult and critical issues, even if your children seem disinterested.

• Take your children places where they will be challenged to see beyond themselves.

• Expect your children to behave and hold them accountable for their behavior.

• Play with your children regularly.

• Don’t try to be perfect, just spend lots of time.

• Find ways to surprise and delight your family.

• Provide time for grandparents and grandchildren to share secrets with each other.

• Encourage grandparents to share their stories with your children.

• Build a team relationship with those people who are significantly involved with your children.

• Tell and/or read stories to your children even before they are old enough to appreciate it.

• Listen to your children’s stories and encourage them to tell about the events of the day.

• Read aloud stories that will plant seeds about character traits that you value.

• Make up stories using your child as the hero.

• When your children fail, make sure the first thing you do is share their pain.

• In order to teach your children how to handle tough times, help them get all the facts into perspective.

• Learn to accept failures with a bit of humor.

• Encourage your children to learn from failure by accepting responsibility.

• Teach children how to deal with failure by modeling confession and forgiveness.

• Teach children that forgiveness doesn’t take away the consequences or the memory, but it does give us hope.

• Help children learn that the greatest failure comes from hiding shame and denying guilt.

• Replace “If only” with “Next time.” This simple change keeps you focused on the future, not the past.

• Encourage your children to claim their own personal space—its an early milestone.

• Give your children the opportunity to sleep over at the house of a friend or relative.

• Consider each grade of school as a milestone that gradually helps children gain information and wisdom.

• Allow your children to experience life beyond the boundaries of your protective eyes.

• Consider the phone and the car as extensions of your children’s life. Celebrate their ability to use them responsibility.

• Encourage your children to try different jobs.

• Respond with sensitivity when your children tell you about their crushes—never tease, or embarrass them in front of their friends.

• Encourage your children to make a personal commitment to their faith.

• Remember that convictions are shaped early by both, the sights, and sounds of home.

• Confine your lectures to a few basic principles.

• Make the rules; enforce the rules; and, live by the rules.

• Learn how to forgive before you are asked, and pass that ability on to your children.

• Coach your children through crises; don’t rescue them.

• Encourage your children to talk about their worries and concerns.

• Reduce your children’s stress by showing them how to pray.

• Learn how to be a crisis coach—listen without judgment, make sure the facts are accurate, and help the child take appropriate action.

• Search for things to laugh about—humor helps everyone stay balanced.

• Look for signs of pain—tears, aggressive behavior, withdrawal, etc.

• Help children to learn that there is nothing too sad or too terrible to be talked about.

• Look back on the disasters your family has faced together and talk about what you have learned from them.

• Showing your children how much you love each other—in spite of imperfections.

• Develop birthday rituals that celebrate life and love and each person’s unique gift to the family.

• Make your family traditions fun.

• Attend family reunions and stay connected to your relatives.

• Bless each child by telling him or her about the wonderful person you see developing.