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Buy 7 Things Kids Never Forget
Ideas for High Impact Parenting
by Ron Rose

    The following suggestions were collected during my research for the book 7 Things Kids Never Forget. Parents who practice these things will become influential, High Impact Parents, HIP for short.

  • Fill your times with positive experiences.

  • Do unusual or outlandish things just for the kids.

  • Discuss difficult and critical issues, even if your children seem disinterested.

  • Take your children places where they will be challenged to see beyond themselves.

  • Expect your children to behave and hold them accountable for their behavior.

  • Play with your children regularly.

  • Don’t try to be perfect, just spend lots of time.

  • Find ways to surprise and delight your family.

  • Provide time for grandparents and grandchildren to share secrets with each other.

  • Encourage grandparents to share their stories with your children.

  • Build a team relationship with those people who are significantly involved with your children.

  • Tell and/or read stories to your children even before they are old enough to appreciate it.

  • Listen to your children’s stories and encourage them to tell about the events of the day.

  • Read aloud stories that will plant seeds about character traits that you value.

  • Make up stories using your child as the hero.

  • When your children fail, make sure the first thing you do is share their pain.

  • In order to teach your children how to handle tough times, help them get all the facts into perspective.

  • Learn to accept failures with a bit of humor.

  • Encourage your children to learn from failure by accepting responsibility.

  • Teach children how to deal with failure by modeling confession and forgiveness.

  • Teach children that forgiveness doesn’t take away the consequences or the memory, but it does give us hope.

  • Help children learn that the greatest failure comes from hiding shame and denying guilt.

  • Replace “If only” with “Next time.” This simple change keeps you focused on the future, not the past.

  • Encourage your children to claim their own personal space—its an early milestone.

  • Give your children the opportunity to sleep over at the house of a friend or relative.

  • Consider each grade of school as a milestone that gradually helps children gain information and wisdom.

  • Allow your children to experience life beyond the boundaries of your protective eyes.

  • Consider the phone and the car as extensions of your children’s life. Celebrate their ability to use them responsibility.

  • Encourage your children to try different jobs.

  • Respond with sensitivity when your children tell you about their crushes—never tease, or embarrass them in front of their friends.

  • Encourage your children to make a personal commitment to their faith.

  • Remember that convictions are shaped early by both, the sights, and sounds of home.

  • Confine your lectures to a few basic principles.

  • Make the rules; enforce the rules; and, live by the rules.

  • Learn how to forgive before you are asked, and pass that ability on to your children.

  • Coach your children through crises; don’t rescue them.

  • Encourage your children to talk about their worries and concerns.

  • Reduce your children’s stress by showing them how to pray.

  • Learn how to be a crisis coach—listen without judgment, make sure the facts are accurate, and help the child take appropriate action.

  • Search for things to laugh about—humor helps everyone stay balanced.

  • Look for signs of pain—tears, aggressive behavior, withdrawal, etc.

  • Help children to learn that there is nothing too sad or too terrible to be talked about.

  • Look back on the disasters your family has faced together and talk about what you have learned from them.

  • Showing your children how much you love each other—in spite of imperfections.

  • Develop birthday rituals that celebrate life and love and each person’s unique gift to the family.

  • Make your family traditions fun.

  • Attend family reunions and stay connected to your relatives.

  • Bless each child by telling him or her about the wonderful person you see developing.

HEARTLIGHT(R) Magazine is a ministry of loving Christians and the Westover Hills church of Christ.
Edited by Phil Ware and Paul Lee.
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