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The Me Degeneration, by Paul Lee

    Work. Church. Teaching. Work some more. Housework. Errands. Quick bites. More work. Phones. Email. Chat. Brief conversations with wife and child. Back to work. If there’s time, get a little sleep.

    Sound like your life? OK, maybe it’s a little extreme, but it bears an unpleasant resemblance to my life at times. If you'll look closely, you’ll notice that there isn’t a whole lot of time for a lot of the things in life that are actually quite important. The schedule doesn’t include long drives with my wife and the wonderful conversations that result. There’s a noticeable lack of time allotted to playing “Old Maid” with my daughter, and nowhere near enough time reading together. My own reading time is shortchanged, too; the best I can manage is a few quick pages of an O’Reilly book when I’m stuck on a programming problem. My only time to enjoy the music I’ve collected is when I’m working at my computer.

    I didn’t intend to become a workaholic, if that’s what you want to call it. I don’t think anyone tells their high school guidance counselor, “I want to work way too much!” So why do we do it? I know so many people chained to their desks, glued to their keyboards, locked into their offices. Why?

    Maybe some are trying to escape problems at home; that’s not my problem, but that may be the source of the trouble for others. Maybe we get obsessed with getting ahead, making more money, getting the approval we crave. Again, I don’t think that’s me, but I guess I have a bit of that.

    For me, it’s a simple thing: there are important things to be done! I look at the tasks in front of me, at the opportunities ahead, at the possibilities for amazing success, and I just can’t say no. There’s my weakness. I want to do it all. I want to be an integral part of every solution to every problem I face. God has blessed me with abilities and talents, and I want to use them to serve him every minute of the day.

    Someday I won't be me... But, as I’m understanding more and more each day, that’s not what I should be doing. By allowing myself to become immersed in my work, I’m losing more and more of me. The things that make me who I am are slipping away. My wife and child, my friends and family, my hobbies and interests. The risk is that someday I won’t be “me” at all—just sort of a working machine. And as “me” degenerates into a faded memory, I know God weeps for the misguided soul who thought he could serve his God by working every hour.

    Well, I’m not there yet. But a few months ago, I got a pretty clear vision of where I was headed. Since then, I've made a conscious effort to say the word “No” more often. No to extra projects, tasks and duties that would only pull me further away from my family. No to things I really didn’t have time for in the first place.

    I'm also working to reclaim “me.” I read two non-work related books this past month (Thomas Cahill’s How the Irish Saved Civilization and Gerry McDermott’s Seeing God). I’ve set aside more and more time to play games and talk with my daughter. I ignored the computer for several nights and watched the Olympics with my wife. I’ve even gone a whole weekend without checking email! With my new job, I’m now able to eat lunch every day with my family, and I cherish the minutes I can spend with them. And when baseball season starts back up, I’ll enjoy every inning I get to watch. Those things are part of “me.” I can’t let them disintegrate.

    So that schedule I gave you at the beginning is a quite a bit different now. Sure, there’s work, and I probably still do too much, but I’m getting there. More fun, more relaxation, more quiet times, more conversation—all these things contribute to a healthier “me.” Sort of “The Me Regeneration.”

    I know I’m not the only one out there. Stop letting work work you!

    Are you avoiding problems? Face them!

    Are you craving approval? Know that God in Heaven loves you so find your significance in his grace!

    Are you just unable to say “No!”? Learn how! Practice it in the mirror if you have to!

    The potential losses from working your life away far outweigh the gains you may experience. Join with me in committing to God that we will not neglect ourselves, our families, or our very souls in the pursuit of success, the desire for approval, the need for accomplishment, or the avoidance of difficulties.

    In a strange sort of irony, the “me” degenerates when our world becomes all about “me” and I don’t order my life by God’s grace and purpose. Regenerate today!

 
 
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Article copyright © 1998, Paul Lee. Used by permission.
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