Articles by Tammy Marcelain at Heartlight

Worthless Religion?

marcelain5@sbcglobal.net (Tammy Marcelain) — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 00:00:00 -0500

When you pray, what do you ask for?

I ask God to make me more like Jesus tomorrow than I am today. This is my one consistent prayer I ask of God each time I pray. I pray this when I pray on my own and when I pray with my kids. That probably sounds cliche, but that is my heart's desire and that is what I want for my kids. I don't want to be rich. I don't want a fancy home -- earthly things just seem to keep me as their possession not the other way around. I just want to love with a love that comes from Christ.

I want to love those who others either don't see or those who, for whatever reason, are not easy to love. I want to love people as they are, no strings attached. I want to see them through the eyes of Christ for what they can become -- for what they can overcome if they will just follow the path God has for them. A friend helps a lot in those circumstances. I want to be that friend.

Christ's unconditional love brought me from drug and alcohol abuse. It was never someone telling me I shouldn't be participating in all the mess that had me trapped. The people who helped me along the way were kind, loving, and authentic with their own struggles. The spirit of condemnation that many display in their speech and attitudes repulse and put walls up between them and others who need the love of Jesus.

Recently, I heard someone speak very hurtful words about a certain type of people who struggle with a certain type of sin. These hurtful words probably would have turned someone with this struggle away from Christ if they had been present when spoken. These words would have confirmed the bias that most of the non-churched culture has toward Christians.

Isn't it time that God's people start talking like God's people, acting like God's people, loving like God's people? Isn't it time we quit choosing what sins we can accept in those around us and in us, then bash the rest of sinners as if we were so much better than they are?

A great man of faith who I am blessed to know, M.C. Cranfill, is now well past his 80th birthday. He is a sweet and godly man, giving his life to caring for his wife in her declining health. M.C. used to make a business card up to carry with him. He might still have some in his wallet. He put the name of our church, then underneath, Hospital for Sinners.

That is what I want our church to be -- a hospital for sinners. Yet, I wonder if there are certain kinds of sinners who we don't welcome with open arms into our church because of our biases? I know we will answer to the Lord for how much we love those who are lost. I also know that we will answer to the Lord for the pain we cause others who are searching for Christ, but who we drive away because of our careless and hurtful words and attitudes.

Do our words or actions cause some to just leave and give up? Is there really no hope for them, even in Christ and in the fellowship of his people? Have we, as His followers, made that hopelessness very clear by our careless and hateful words?

Jesus and His brother James remind us that our love for the lost includes the way we talk about them and their sin. Our words matter just like our search for purity and our care for the needy. What's more, these words reveal what is in each of our hearts! Jesus said it this way:

"For whatever is in your heart determines what you say. A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. And I tell you this, you must give an account on judgment day for every idle word you speak. The words you say will either acquit you or condemn you" (Matthew 12:34-37 NLT).

James wrote followers of Jesus:

Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you. Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. Those who listen to the word but do not do what it says are like people who look at their faces in a mirror and, after looking at themselves, go away and immediately forget what they look like.

But those who look intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continue in it -- not forgetting what they have heard, but doing it -- they will be blessed in what they do. Those who consider themselves religious and yet do not keep a tight rein on their tongues deceive themselves, and their religion is worthless (James 1:21-26 TNIV).

Let's make sure our words, and our attitudes, reflect the heart of Jesus! "O God, please make me more like Jesus!"

More of Tammy's work can be found on her blog, In the Grip of Grace or her Marcelain Photography Blog.

Tammy is part of The Coffee Group, a varied group of women who express their love, faith, and praise for God with ladies they love. They do ladies' retreats and special speaking on God's work in their lives, as well as the importance of sharing your faith story.

Check out their website:
http://www.thecoffeegroup.net

Come visit them on their blog:
http://www.espressohislove.blogspot.com

The Coffee Group is part of the Heartlight.org Network

Tammy Marcelain is part of The Coffee Group. For many years Tammy walked away from the Lord and through His love and grace she has come home to His loving hands. Tammy's son jack was diagnosed with a brain tumor in April of 2005. Her life shows how to hold onto the Lord and live through His grace in hard times.

Website: Tammy's Blog

Belief?

marcelain5@sbcglobal.net (Tammy Marcelain) — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 00:00:00 -0600

Belief.

I do believe, help me overcome my unbelief. These are words I say to God every day. Words taken from Scripture (Mark 9:24). I asked Jesus to be my Savior when I was in the 7th grade. After studying and making the choice, I asked my dad to baptize me in our swimming pool. That very day I was saved, but it took me 20 years to make Him my Lord and Savior.

What's the difference?

By submitting myself under His Lordship, I have been given a gift -- a gift to trust Him to guide me where He wants me to go. For much of my late teenage life and early adulthood, I trusted no one. I was trying to check out of my life mentally and emotionally by using drugs and alcohol. I was searching for love in places where there is only darkness. God saw me through that time and called me to Him. Gratefully, I felt I had no other options left ... so I followed.

Fast forward a couple of years, and I had been living a Christian life, working in a church, and doing all the "right" things. But, I was still not submitting all that I am to Him. How do I know that? Because I allowed worry, anxiety, and need for control to be my lord. I thought that was normal, because it was everywhere I turned. Many people (not all) were worried themselves, worried about money and the lack of it, worried about health, worried about their kids, worried about their jobs, and worried about ... I fit right in.

I was confronted with a real choice. Did I really believe that God was in the details of my life? Or, did I just believe that He was to be worshiped on Sunday and then real life happened after that?

When I began in depth bible study a number of years ago, my eyes opened a little to this lack of faith I was struggling with. I longed, and still long, for the faith of a champion of God. Along the way, however, God led me to an exciting discovery.

The Bible has a faith Hall of Fame (Hebrews 11). These are people who had the kind of faith to be recognized by God as special. Yet as I looked closer at them, I found that many struggled to gain that faith through difficult circumstances. In fact, their faith was grown through those circumstances and struggles.

God uses broken people -- people like you and me. In fact, that is when God's strength can often best be seen. Last week in Bible study, I was touched by a quote: "God is drawn to weakness." Thanks be to God for that, because I am weak. Yet God calls me to grow stronger in Him each day, to move from milk to meat, to move from a faith that is easily shaken to a faith that has been tested and can weather a storm that might have toppled it just last week. Faith through circumstances, struggles, and storms can lead me to growth!

Our faith is refined by fire; the more fires we walk through the stronger our faith grows. Fire burns, but what it burns away is our pride, greed, and selfishness; and what it leaves is a humbled servant of God ready to say, "Here I am Lord, I will go where you lead." To be content in our circumstances and trust God that we are part of His great plan are gifts that brings tears to my eyes. Thanks be to God.

The gift of trust, this genuine faith I'm talking about, is one of the greatest earthly gifts we could ever receive. I don't want to waste this gift any longer. I think it is one of the traits that shine the light of Jesus through Christians.

So how does one get this faith?

God grows faith, we just need to seek Him with all of our heart and He will increase it.

So how do I seek Him?

I seek Him through prayer, Bible study, and reciting Scripture ... I take Scriptures that stand against whatever I am struggling with and I quote those Scriptures throughout the day. I keep them with me. I say them over and over. I keep putting the words of God into my head and into my heart. I believe this is a crucial exercise.

Jesus tells the story about a man who cleans out his house of the one demon that is living there, but he leaves his house clean, yet empty. So the demon comes back and brings his evil friends who take up residence in the house. The end of the situation of the house is worse than it was at the first of it (Matthew 12:43-45).

The point for me is simple. I can push out the fear, worry or anxiety, but if I am not re-wallpapering my mind with the promises and faithfulness of God, then the fear and worry come back fourfold -- debilitatingly more powerful. So I seek God through prayer, Bible study, and repeating Scriptures.

Does my life always look like I want it to?

Hardly ever. But God is with me. I am never forsaken.

Are there hardships?

Absolutely! Yet these hardships are the times where "the rubber meets the road." I can either shine for Jesus or wither like a lilly in a drought. So I call on God in the hardships. And, if I am willing to seek Him, He gives me peace and shows me the way He wants me to go. It's then that I realize, through it all -- the hardships, struggles, and even weaknesses -- He has answered my prayer. God has grown my faith. And so I pray it again, "I do believe, help me overcome my unbelief."

Tammy is part of The Coffee Group, a varied group of women who express their love, faith, and praise for God with ladies they love. They do ladies' retreats and special speaking on God's work in their lives, as well as the importance of sharing your faith story.

Check out their website:
http://www.thecoffeegroup.net

Come visit them on their blog:
http://www.espressohislove.blogspot.com

The Coffee Group is part of the Heartlight.org Network

Website: Tammy's Blog

Just a Breath

marcelain5@sbcglobal.net (Tammy Marcelain) — Sun, 02 Mar 2008 00:00:00 -0600

Peace. Many seek peace.

I talked with my sister today and she told me she was in the middle of a breakdown. She is struggling with some health issues right now, including shingles, and she locked her keys in her running car. A simple text message to her this morning, "Yo what's up sis?" found her in the midst of crisis.

What is it that she lacks in her life?

I know, because I have stood right where she is standing. She doesn't have a relationship with Jesus. She is struggling right now to find where He fits in her life. Today I say, "Just cover me up with Him, there is no place for Him not to fit." But, my heart aches for her as I know just how she feels and struggles to reconcile life and the pain that comes with it. Life is overwhelming when we don't have Jesus. And even if we do, we can often be overwhelmed because our eyes have been distracted to earthly needs and desires.

As I write this, I continue to breathe prayers to Jesus on her behalf. Will it be today that she lifts her eyes to Him and says, "I am done trying to do it on my own, I need you O Lord. Save me from myself."?

God's will for our lives is not that we be perfect, not that we come to him without sin. He made us. He knew the messes we would make. He knew the weaknesses we have. He chose to create us so we would need him.

Some of us have to travel every other road but him before we find the only path that leads us Home. Satan knows just what to put in the middle of those other roads to draw us away from God nearer to himself. He wants us to just take a look, and meander on a bit. But, once the dirt has touched our shoes, we might not even notice just how far down the road we have travelled until we are afraid that there is no turning back.

What is it that leads us to believe that there is a roadblock that won't allow us to turn around and come back to God? Is it the roadblock of shame or pride? Those roadblocks might look like they are made of stone and impossible to get around, but that is an illusion. They are paper thin. In fact, our breath could blow the road block away. And it does just that when we get down on our knees, and ask God to lead the way. With the breath of a prayer, asking for God's help, that roadblock that looked like a fortress is gone in an instant.

Nothing is impossible with God -- not even finding our way home to him from the twisted, tangled roads we have traveled. Remember the story of the prodigal son?

[Jesus is speaking] "The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.'

"But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate" (Luke 15:21-24 TNIV).

I have never seen God work more powerfully in my life, than when it came to turning away from sin. It was then, that the Father gave me a path to follow that would lead me right back to Him. He can do that for you ... and for my sis. A morning that is full of crisis can lead to a life that is filled with the only true peace, the peace of knowing Jesus as our Savior. It begins with a breath. We can breathe that prayer, watch the road blocks fall, and trust our Father to bring us home.

I lift up my eyes to the hills -- where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth (Psalm 121:1-2 NIV).

Website: Tammy's Blog

God Never Stops Calling

marcelain5@sbcglobal.net (Tammy Marcelain) — Thu, 21 Jun 2007 00:00:00 -0500

I was reading a blog post that was forwarded to me from a friend. (I couldn't make the link work.) The post was written by a mom who had left her pursuit of faith behind years ago. Now she has a child who has never gone to church or been around a community of faith, and she was feeling guilty. My friend said that it was a reading that had stuck with her. It has been on my heart as well.

I believe that there are people all around us that feel the way this mom does. They are searching for a relationship with Jesus. They want to come back home, but when they walk into a church building, they are put off by all the barriers. They have to learn all the rules. They need to know the traditions. They really should get working in some of the church programs. They're asked to go to pot luck luncheons to meet folks. They are signed up for committees to help minister to outsiders. They are nudged to be involved in ... and the list goes on.

But the truth is, they can't find Jesus! And without Jesus, they can't find their way home to God. So where does all their searching often lead them? To a group of good people, doing good things, and trying to help each other along. But they can't seem to find Jesus.

In that situation, Jesus gets lost in all the details. Of course He is in the heart of His believers, but the seekers from the outside can't seem to find Him there. I know I could not find Jesus in someone else's actions. I did not find Him from the words spoken from the pulpit, as inspirational as they can be. I could not find a personal relationship with my Savior through anyone else. I had to seek Him ... not the stuff that claimed to be about Him. And I found that He was waiting for me all along. He was right by my side through the ugly and not so ugly.

I decided I wanted God; but not knowing where to find Him, I started looking for Him in all those churchy places. I sang worship songs, but the words felt empty. After all, I wasn't going to submit my life to anyone. I was in charge of me. I took communion to remember the crucifixion and resurrection, but Jesus had died a long time ago. The current sin I was in really didn't seem to matter in my mind -- after all, how does someone have fun if they don't party? For some strange reason, I never found the connection between God's call to my heart and the call to change my behavior. I only opened my eyes to the shiny surface of my life, but it was completely empty below the shiny surface.

But there came a point in my journey when I realized that God would not settle for only a part of my life. He wanted more than two hours of my time on Sunday morning. I had been taught about pride, rights, looking out for number one, and pulling myself up by my own boot straps. I really lived each of these, but my heart ached. So when did my heart really connect to Jesus? It was only when I realized that I was not the god of my own life. It was only when I realized that finding Jesus was not going to be on my terms, but His.

That connection happened on the floor of my bedroom, down on my knees, pleading for God to be my God. It began with me asking Him to help me find Him. I would seek Him every day of my life. I would read His Word. I would try to live a life that glorified Him and not me. And only then, when I gave Him all of me, did my heart meet His.

A year later, I went back home to Arizona because a friend of mine was getting married. I was staying at a friend's home. One of my friend's roommates questioned me about my new found Christianity. Their biggest problems with Christianity were the rules. There were so many of them, following them seemed impossible. Why even try?

As a relatively new Christian at the time, I didn't have the best answer. But, I think I responded that it just felt right when nothing else did. I told them that the rules they were talking about also left me empty. If I were to try to follow a dot-to-dot, color-by-numbers Christianity, I'd be in a place a lot like my life before: far away from God. But with Jesus as the focus, there is nothing to earn; His grace fills in when I fall short. He brings me into the presence of God.

When I turned my heart to God, I told them, the rest just fell into place. The sins dropped off, one-by-one. What felt right before, just didn't feel right anymore with God at the center of my life. I grew a lot through church and the fellowship of believers, but when I met Christ for the first time, it was just Him and me ... alone in my room ... no pride left ... only humility and a seeking heart.

God tells us in Scripture to seek Him with all of our heart and we will find Him. And I did! But only when I realized that He would not settle for my leftovers; he wanted all of me. Just as my husband won't settle for my leftovers, God wants my whole heart.

I feel blessed that I have a relationship with Jesus, but the seeking never ends. He calls me to pursue Him every day. When I do, I have the peace of heart that I could never have even imagined twenty years ago. The story above is from when I was in my early twenties, now I am knocking on the door of my forties. However, those moments long ago are still vivid in my memory today.

God never stops calling us. He calls to us whether we just communed with Him, or if he was a long lost friend with whom we haven't spoken in years. So open your ears and hear him calling. Lift your eyes and behold His glory. He longs to have you close and have your life changed because you have been changed by being in His presence.

Website: Tammy's Blog

A Soul Called Leslie

marcelain5@sbcglobal.net (Tammy Marcelain) — Sun, 18 Mar 2007 00:00:00 -0500

Don't forget to show hospitality to strangers, for some who have done this have entertained angels without realizing it! (Hebrews 13:2 NLT)

This week I was talking to my friend Evette. She doesn't read my blog, but friends from church know her, and I am sure she won't mind me retelling her story. She inspired me.

First of all, let me tell you about a soul called Leslie. The first time I saw Leslie, 7-8 years ago, he was standing in the back of my church wearing a tight teal blue dress, 3" red heels, make up, bright red lipstick, his hair was -- and still is -- long, and he was carrying a gold purse.

He just stood there just as plain as day looking for a seat. My family sits on the back row and my twins were infants at the time, so I can't say that my whole attention was on this visitor, but he certainly caught my attention.

Several people went up to Leslie and visited with him. I am assuming someone asked him to sit with them. He came back to church while he was in Abilene several times, maybe off and on for several months, but one day he decided it was time to move on. There were several people who tried to reach out a helping hand to Leslie -- food, money and even some men's clothing, although he was not interested in the latter.

Leslie found his way to Austin. That is where he lives now. And that is where my story for today really starts. My friend, Evette, told me she was in Austin for a teacher's conference. She knew that Leslie hung out on 6th street, so she went looking for him. She had been one of the people who had befriended Leslie in Abilene.

Evette asked several people if they knew where Leslie could be found. One woman said to her, "Why would you want to find him?"

Evette said as plain as day, and very convicted, "He is my friend."

She eventually found Leslie and visited with him on the street. She asked him if he remembered her, and he said, "Yes, you are Evette, from Abilene."

Leslie works the streets. He is addicted and looks gaunt and thin. His hair is thinning. The clothes he was wearing were women's under garments and he was on the street. People that walked by knew the person he was -- his character, his life -- but my friend, Evette, talked with him as though he was a long lost friend and she was proud to know him.

I told Evette, "God bless you. I am not sure that I would have sought out Leslie." Later on, upon further reflection, I realized I would never have sought out Leslie. If I would have seen Leslie in his street attire, I probably would have avoided him -- put my eyes down and never looked up. This is a sad and sorry confession, but I would have let my fear of the unknown keep me from loving and engaging the soul called Leslie.

God forgive me! Help me see your children with your eyes. Help me love with your compassion. Help my heart break for those whom you love that are lost, even when it gets messy. God bless Evette. May she continue to love with your love and inspire me -- and others -- to get out of our comfort zones and love those we don't understand.

God loves Leslie, and so must we. There will be Leslie's in all of our lives -- people that make us uncomfortable, people that don't fit our mold, people that are obnoxious and arrogant, people that hurt our feelings -- but those are our Leslie's. God loves us in our worst moments, how can we withhold that love from others?

For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. ... But God proves his love for us in that while we still were sinners Christ died for us. ... For if while we were enemies, we were reconciled to God through the death of his Son, much more surely, having been reconciled, will we be saved by his life. (Romans 5:6-10 NRS emphasis added)

Website: Tammy's Blog

I Got God!

marcelain5@sbcglobal.net (Tammy Marcelain) — Sun, 04 Mar 2007 00:00:00 -0600

Special Note: Tammy has been very open about sharing her son's journey in his battle with a brain tumor and the challenges involved with doctors, chemotherapy, radiation, and faith -- see the links at the bottom of this page. She is part of The Coffee Group.

Jack and I were sitting on the couch the other night. We were watching our favorite show, Deal or No Deal. This show drives me crazy. When I say "our favorite show," I mean my kids' favorite show. I just enjoy being a part of their excitement and listening to their advice for the contestants. My oldest son, Derek, is always pushing for the contestant to open one more suitcase. Jack and I are both saying take the money and go home. My daughter, Sophie, doesn't give her two cents very often.

Jack was playing his Game Boy at the same time we were watching the TV. He was sitting right next to me. The commercial for H & R Block came on the television. You've probably seen them. The punch line is, "I got people." You hear it a half a dozen times during the commercial.

At the end of the commercial, Jack, with his nose in his Game Boy, says, "I got mama." Tears, tears and more tears streamed down my face. I said, "Yes, you do Jack."

My meager human heart was swollen with emotion with those three words: "I got mama." I love Jack so much. Even now, to write those words makes me cry.

What must God feel when things are hard for us and we say in no uncertain terms, with no waiver in our voice, "I got God."

There was no waiver in Jack's voice when he said, "I got mama." Jack knows I can not fix his brain tumor, but I am by his side ALL the way ... and God is at our side ALL the way.

I don't know God's plans for Jack. I pray for healing, but I don't know if that is in God's big scheme of things. However, no matter which case gets opened, there is peace and confidence in knowing, "I GOT GOD!"

God has said,
"I will never fail you. I will never forsake you"
(Hebrews 13:5 NLT).

Website: Tammy's Blog

Fighting the Silent Disease

marcelain5@sbcglobal.net (Tammy Marcelain) — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 00:00:00 -0600

But remember that the temptations that come into your life are no different from what others experience. And God is faithful. He will keep the temptation from becoming so strong that you can't stand up against it. When you are tempted, he will show you a way out so that you will not give in to it (1 Corinthians 10:13 NLT).

What is a cancer? My definition: A cancer is something that is foreign to the place where it lives. A cancer can spread and invade other places in your body or in your life. There is the cancer that we all know -- abnormal cells that reproduce in our body causing our normal cells trouble. There is also the cancer of sin. Sin that finds its way into our thoughts and that spreads through our heart.

Lance Armstrong is featured in a recent television commercial on cancer. He speaks of how cancer made him stronger. I connected with his words, because that is what the Lord did for me through my son's battle with a brain tumor, a benign cancer. Jack was five at the time of diagnosis. He is now seven, and we continue to work through struggles with his continued health.

Through the months of chemotherapy, I sat right next to Jack in a large room filled with men, women, and children being treated for cancer. There was a common feeling in the room, "I will do all I can to keep the cancer from taking over my body. I will not lie down quietly while my body dies a quiet death. I will fight for my life and I will not give up. Lord help me."

The sense of accomplishment when those words come true cannot even be described. It is like falling over a cliff, grabbing on to a lone branch, and climbing back up to the top. The Lord is mightily by your side, creating that branch that you grabbed, making foot holds in the cliff gently with His fingertip, and giving us the avenues to climb. However, the steps must be taken by us. We must reach out for that branch. We must look for the next place to put our feet. We must climb toward the top, trusting even in times of uncertainty.

Once that mountaintop is reached, there is a feeling of beating death, a strength has been tapped into that likely we did not even know existed. The future is filled with more intentional actions, focusing on what is important. The little things that once ruined our day are now just inconveniences. There is an urgency to share the Gospel and a boldness that was not there before.

What happens if a Christian doesn't make it to the top of that cliff?

I have to believe that our Lord has counted our days and that was the day that our work on earth was to be done. And when we are done, we are delivered into Jesus' arms -- a place we all hope and pray to reside for eternity.

And for those left on earth to live another day, we continue to strive to run the race and persevere with a renewed spirit.

The cancer of sin can leave us even more helpless than physical cancer. God will give you a branch to grasp, a foothold to climb, and an avenue of escape. With a spiritual cancer, we must use God's word rather than chemo. Praise and worship are the shot in the arm to raise our spirits. The avenues of escape are there, so dig in your heels, let God help you, and resolve to fight against Satan's influence in your life.

When you get to the top of that mountain, the feeling is much the same as it is with defeating physical cancer. You have an urgency to share the Gospel. You are more intentional about using your life for important things. You are committed to not letting the cancer take hold again.

Cancer is called the silent disease because it often grows in us without our awareness. I believe that sin can be even more silent than physical cancer. There is no test a doctor can do to detect it, but the Holy Spirit will always know the state of our spirit. His job is to convict us (John 16:7-8) and to empower us (Ephesians 3:14-21; 1 John 4:4). So pray for God to open your eyes to the silent killer in your life, then start looking for the branch, the foothold, and the avenue! If you look closely, the top is in site!

Website: Tammy's Blog